If you are lucky enough to experience the unconditional love of a wonderful, loving soulmate pet, then you also know what it is like to feel depressed after losing a pet.

Although many people in our world don’t view the death of a pet as a significant loss, believe me, it is one of the most devastating life experiences you can go through.

Which is why it is very normal to feel sad, withdrawn, hopeless, and depressed when your pet’s beautiful soul inevitably leaves their physical body.

If you are in this situation right now, first and foremost, I am SO sorry for your loss. I understand how painful it is to grieve a pet that was your whole world.

When I had to say goodbye to my beautiful and perfect soul-creature-kitty Squiggles, part of me went with her. Losing her changed who I am as a person.

It isn’t a bad thing, it isn’t a good thing. It just is.

We all grieve differently, but typically go through a few common stages of grief as we move through the process. And for me, one of the most challenging stages was the depression stage.

Grief After Losing A Pet

When grieving the loss of a beloved pet, it’s common to experience overwhelmingly sad emotions that are very similar to symptoms of depression. Especially in the weeks and months following the loss. This includes:

• Feeling low, empty, numb or sad for most of the day
• Loss or changes in appetite
• Trouble sleeping or sleeping too much
• Intense bouts of sadness and tearfulness
• Increased irritability and anger
• Low energy and withdrawn
• Inability to focus or make decisions
• Lost of interest in activities you once enjoyed
• Feelings of guilt or self-doubt

Losing a pet is so emotionally distressing. The grief you experience can make you feel like you’re sinking into a depression. And if you are more prone to depression or have been diagnosed in the past, the grief from losing a pet can trigger a new bout of clinical depression.

Please remember that there is nothing wrong with you if this happens. You are going through an extremely painful life event. You have lost one of the most meaningful and supportive beings in your life. It’s okay to have the emotions you’re feeling.

Depression After Losing A Pet

I want to share a few telltale signs to look out for that might mean your grief symptoms have morphed into a type of clinical depression. It is important to recognize these distinctions so you can seek the additional support you need to cope and care for yourself.

And hopefully, one day, be able to live your life the way your pet would want you to.

Here are some things to look out for, that may indicate your grief has turned into depression, and its worth getting some extra help:

1. You experience constant emotional pain or numbness

When grieving, you will likely experience waves of sadness, waves of feeling neutral, even moments of joy. With depression, the sadness and hopelessness are constant.

2. You feel worthless

When grieving, you may have moments where you doubt yourself or feel insecure, but in general, self-esteem remains intact. When depressed, feelings of worthlessness are constant.

3. You can’t function

With grief, you may not feel like yourself but can still get through your days. When depressed, your daily life is severely impacted and you may have trouble with your job, in your relationships, or when it comes to basic hygiene and taking care of yourself.

4. You have thoughts of ending your life

With grief, you may yearn for your pet and look forward to the day that you join them at the rainbow bridge. But when you’re depressed, you do not want to wait for that day. You feel like life isn’t worth living without them and thoughts of ending your life are prevalent.

If you are feeling suicidal after losing your pet, you can find immediate assistance online by googling “suicide help now.” And here are some additional resources:

USA: Crisis Text Line – Text “HELLO” to 741741

UK: Mind – Information and support for mental health

Canada: Kids Help Phone – Call 1-800-668-6868 or text “CONNECT” to 686868

Australia: Beyond Blue – Call 1300 22 4636

Mitigating Pet-Grief Depression: Steps to Help You Cope

Feeling depressed is completely normal after losing your pet. And because grief has no timeline, I can’t tell you how long the symptoms may last.

What I can share are 3 things you can do to help cope when those depression symptoms feel completely unmanageable and are starting to impact you more than you’d like.

1. Let yourself feel depressed

I know this may sound counterintuitive, but when you try to bury the pain and sadness you feel after losing a pet, it can fester and create bigger issues for you in the long run.

As they say, “the only way out is through.” This means that if you want to get to a place where the joy from the memories outweigh the sorrow, you have to let yourself feel the sorrow. Let yourself cry. Even if it’s months or years later.

And if you don’t know how to do this, download my free feelings guide. You can also check out this post on How To Get Good At Feeling Depressed and Overwhelmed.

2. Commit To Small Self-Care Goals

Basic self-care is so essential when you’re grieving a pet. But you may not have the energy or motivation to do much. And that’s okay.

Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Try to commit to one small act of self-care. And then cut it in half.

For example, if it’s been weeks since you’ve cleaned the kitchen but you’re feeling too low to even try, start with cleaning 1 dish.

Or if you are putting pressure on yourself to get out of the house and have fun, try just getting out of the house instead.

The last thing you want to do when feeling depressed is set yourself up for failure. It’s only going to dig you into a deeper hole and make you feel less capable of coping.

When you’re grieving a pet, it’s okay to take one small step to care for yourself at a time. And once you take that first small step, you may be surprised by where it will end up taking you.

3. Connect with others who get it

When you are feeling depressed after losing a pet, it is very common to withdraw from loved ones and friends. And I understand. It took me at least a month before I was ready to see anyone after Squiggles died.

And then when you are with other people, all you want is to be left alone so you can grieve. It’s such a complex and confusing experience!

But isolating yourself is a slippery slope, and can lead to even worse feelings of sadness and pain.

If people in your life don’t understand the depth of your pain, that can also create more loneliness and despair.

And when your pet is the one thing you can count on when feeling sad and depressed, but they are no longer present in their physical form, it can leave you feeling completely lost. And like there is nowhere to turn for relief from the emotional pain.

Luckily there are a few places you can turn – my free Facebook group, It’s All The Same Forest, is a great start.

If you’re looking for my intimate healing and live group support sessions, you can join my private community for bereaved pet parents, the Furever Forest.

It is not going to replace your beloved pet. Or even come close. But it is filled with kind and compassionate souls who get it, and I invite you to join us as you navigate your pet grief journey.

And if you want more intimate support, you can become a member and gain 24/7 access to our community of animal lovers who get it. 

Please remember, it’s okay to ask for help any time. But especially when you’re grieving a beloved pet. I hope that you’ll join us in the Furever Forest so you can start to heal. Reach out any time if you have questions.